


My Violinist Is Better Than Your Violinist

by nonbinary_pineapple



Category: The Mechanisms (Band)
Genre: Gen, nb Lyf rights!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-25
Updated: 2020-02-25
Packaged: 2021-02-28 06:42:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 802
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22889401
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nonbinary_pineapple/pseuds/nonbinary_pineapple
Summary: Local starship bullies ex space TSA agent
Comments: 13
Kudos: 136
Collections: Stowaways' Shenanigans





	My Violinist Is Better Than Your Violinist

**Author's Note:**

> This took way longer than it should have. Thanks to the Mechs Discord server for the idea! :)

Lyfrassir Edda stands in the middle of a completely empty room, save for a few monitors on the wall and a ratty beanbag chair that appears to only be there to take up space. They have been on the Aurora for a week now and they recognise that this is a spare room that doesn’t really serve a purpose to the crew. In their wanderings, they have seen several rooms like this. Most were inhabited by Stowaways but this room is mercifully empty. Lyf is more than a little creeped out by that semi-eldritch hivemind.

They are about to leave and continue exploring, when a monitor turns on. Lyf watches as words appear, as if they are being typed. After a few seconds, the words stop, and the screen reads _hello lyfrassir edda. i have not gotten to introduce myself yet. i am the starship aurora._

Lyf is more confused than scared. They have seen weirder stuff than this on the ship, and they are half convinced that this is some sort of prank. At this point, they aren’t sure anything on this damned ship could actually bewilder them. The words on the screen have not changed and Lyf realizes it seems to be waiting, so they reply. "Hello?"

The words disappear and new words appear. _i hear you have gotten close with marius._ The screen pauses for a second, but before Lyf can answer, it continues. _my violinist is better than your violinist._ The text stops. Apparently, the ship is gloating.

“Your… he’s not.. my… what!?” Lyf splutters. They hear laughter behind them and turn to see Ivy Alexandria standing in the doorway, holding an octokitten. “Oh, Ivy,” they say, still a bit flustered from what the Aurora “said” to them about Von Raum. I have many questions. “First off, is the ship sentient?”

“That’s an easy one,” Ivy replies, “Yes.”

“Second, there’s another violin player?” At this point, Lyf had met most of the crew and, as far as they knew, Von Raum was the only one who played violin.

“I’m assuming you mean other than Marius. That is also an easy question. Nastya also plays the violin. She is the engineer and the Aurora’s girlfriend.”

Apparently, Lyf was wrong about not finding anything else weird. After a beat, they say, “You know what, I’m not even going to ask anything about that. What I will ask, though, is whether she is as obnoxious as Von Raum?”

"As long as you aren't around for Date Night, Nastya is significantly more pleasant to be around than Marius. She is 55% less likely to kill you." Lyf opens their mouth to say something but Ivy cuts them off. "Don't ask about Date Night, there is an 87% chance that you do not want to hear about that."

Lyf is quiet for a bit, trying not to imagine what "Date Night" is. Then they hear footsteps in the hallway and Von Raum's voice calls out, "Ivy! Are you talking to the Stowaways again? Do they have more information about Inspector Lyf?"

Ivy turns in the direction Von Raum's voice is coming from. "Hello, Marius. I'm not talking to the Stowaways, but your reaction to who I am talking to will be 69% funnier."

"Is it Jonny with a gun? If it's Jonny with a gun, you're getting shot Ivy Alexandria."

"It is also not Jonny with a gun, this time. Come see who it is for yourself, there's only a 14% chance they'll kill you."

Lyf watches as Von Raum walks through the doorway and looks first at the screen, which they realize with a start still has the message about Nastya being better than Von Raum, then at Lyf. He puts away the gun he had drawn before entering the room when he sees them. “I have to go help Raph with something,” Ivy says, walking away before either Von Raum or Lyf can protest.

“Hello, former Inspector Lyf,” Von Raum says, pointedly ignoring the ship’s use of the phrase “your violinist” on the monitor.

“Von Raum,” Lyf replies, pointedly ignoring both the monitor and Von Raum’s pointed ignoring of the monitor.

Loud footsteps in the hallway, coming from the opposite direction from the way Ivy left interrupt their pointed ignoring. A couple seconds later, Jonny D’ville walks into the room and stops when he sees Lyf and Von Raum. He chuckles and says, “Oh look, it’s the lovebirds. If I had known you two were in here together, I would have stayed on the other side of the ship. I’m allergic to pining!” 

Von Raum draws his gun once again chases Jonny out of the room. Lyf turns to the monitor and says, “you know what, Aurora, you’re right,” before following after Von Raum and Jonny at a more respectable pace.

**Author's Note:**

> Welp, I hope you enjoyed!  
> My tumblr is @nonbinary-pineapple


End file.
